“He breaks you, to build you. Deprives you, to give you. This pain in your heart was created to make you yearn less for this life, and to yearn more for Jannah.” – Yasmin Mogahed.
So you’re the one usually looking for peace, needing and wanting calmness, contentment and free from judgements of others etc…yet you’re also that very person who can sometimes even create some animosity or pain without meaning to towards others, and yet still in certain moments in life that you do sincerely wonder, why?
Why did that just happen? Where did this just come from? Why cause this breakage, frustration, anger, annoyance etc…it’s clear certain situations made you feel a certain type of way too and it definitely came from somewhere, and somehow the mind and tongue also slips from time to time. Though, that in itself is betrayal to one self. Now we can easily shift blame on the doer of wrong (Satan), and entertaining those thoughts without knowing, whilst other times, blaming it on the hormones to childhood traumas, other emotional scarrings and/or triggers etc. Now even though these reasons are fundamentally valid and to an extent, does make sense, it is still a betrayal to one self. It’s not even about the other person/s anymore because you have already sought forgiveness. This is just the next step of it all. Clearly. Yet also a lesson, a reminder, and strangely, a blessing within it self. That blessing is a reminder to repent and really know who you are. A slave to God. And to really humble oneself even further. Because we certainly are all imperfect human beings and we are certainly not better than one and other. A reminder that you are a believer, and should stop what you’re doing that is not in line with your faith and beliefs and change oneself for the better of oneself first and foremost and so you feel even good about yourself.
Humbly stated, “When a person feels guilt, and truly knows one’s own fall or failure, they are a believer that will not stop repenting.”
A firm belief, that even though people do that to each other, especially close ones as they are the ones who truly care, yet are also the ones who hurt each other the most, is that ultimately, no-one likes that feeling, that hurt, that pain, that avoidance etc.
“Those who believed, and whose hearts find rest in the remembrance of Allah verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” – 13:28.
Another major firm belief from the reminder back to and of God is that, He breaks you to either make you, improve you, bless you, better you, to drive you, to humble you, to teach you, to remind you, to revert you back to Him to show the true source of power and control, that all resides within the Creator of the Heavens and the Earth and all that is in between.
Even when things are going beautifully great, then humbly and quietly walk this Earth. And even when at times things are not, then also walk humbly and quietly. That, one has learn’t, is life! One loves and appreciates it so. Alhamdulillah. ..x
“Those hardship that Allah sent over to you is His way to cherish your life, is His way to push you further, and is His way to make you a better Muslim today than yesterday.”
Don’t be so harsh on yourself, keep going, beautiful. 🙂